Episode 209 Transcript:

0:00:01 Ramona Shaw: This is episode 209 and were going to talk about being too comfortable as a leader.

0:00:06 Ramona Shaw: Heres the question. How do you successfully transition into your first official leadership role, build the confidence and competence to lead your team successfully and establish yourself as a respected and trusted leader across the organization? Thats the question and this show provides the answers. Welcome to The Manager Track podcast. Im your host Ramona Shaw and Im on a mission to create workplaces where work is not seen as a source of stress and dread, but as a source of contribution, connection and fulfillment.

0:00:35 Ramona Shaw: And this transition starts with developing a new generation of leaders who know how to lead so everyone wins and grows. In this show, you learn how to think, communicate and act. Ask the confident and competent leader you know you can be.

0:00:56 Ramona Shaw: Welcome to this episode of The Manager Track podcast. This episode is about being a bit too comfortable and how easy it is for us to land in a place where we’just a tattoo. Comfortable and not really tapping into the full potential that we have. And this episode has been inspired by my own personal experience. So over the last couple of weeks I realized that ive gotten a lot of personal satisfaction and sense of reward for myself in being consistent with my work.

0:01:28 Ramona Shaw: I felt really good about delivering on projects that were already set out, delivering on recurring tasks, completing project and you simply stick with what I’ve been doing for quite a long time and to continue to do this. And I found it rewarding and felt like a sense of achievement in being consistent and not wavering and not getting off track or being sidetracked by what we call shiny objects, or not feeling bored and then discontinuing the efforts, but to stay with it and to be consistent.

0:02:05 Ramona Shaw: Now im referring to this situation in my own work, but as I took a closer look, I also noticed Im doing the same thing in my personal life as well. For example, I go to the gym every morning after I drop off my youngest daughter and its very consistent whether I feel like it, whether I’m tired, whether my body is sore, I put on the chym clothes and I go to the chym and I follow through on my workout program and no matter what.

0:02:37 Ramona Shaw: And sometimes I push myself really hard and I feel the gains and then sometimes I do exactly what I did last week and I’m not making much progress, but I still give it my all. And I got a lot of satisfaction on consistently going to the gym. But the reason why I’m sharing this is because while it feels good, and we could even argue it is good to stay consistent, I’m not doing certain aspects of my work, because my end goal is to be consistent.

0:03:06 Ramona Shaw: I am not working out only to be consistent. I am working out because I wanna become stronger, I wanna improve my health, my capacity, my strength, my endurance. And that is why I work out, and that is why I’m consistent. But consistency is only a means to the end. Now at work, let’s say, with publishing a podcast episode every Tuesday, I have not missed a single Tuesday of publishing a podcast episode since the very first episode.

0:03:41 Ramona Shaw: And we’re now over 200 episodes into this process. And I’m very consistent about it. And I feel great about this. But I’m not delivering a podcast for the purpose of being consistent. I deliver it to have an impact and to be able to share a message and to influence people who are listening to the podcast. And so I have to take a step back and say, where did I get too comfortable with the consistency? And I’not pushed myself enough to really hone in on the result.

0:04:13 Ramona Shaw: Now, as I was going through this reflection for myself, I also realized that this actually comes up in coaching conversations or when I support leaders and organizations through trainings and programs. It comes up there too, where they are consistently putting in the work, they’re doing all the things that they’re supposed to be doing. They feel good about it, but it’s losing sight of the real impact that their work is having or the voice that they have. And are they actually leveraging that voice or that expertise with the right people in the right moment in order to create the ultimate impact that they want to have? For some, it may be monetary, for some it may be a title, for others it might be responsibilities.

0:05:01 Ramona Shaw: Someone else, it might be access to a responsibility. Someone else might just feel like they want to have a bigger team or lead a team for the first time. Is what you’re doing just about doing good work and executing what you’ve committed to? Or are you actually taking a step back and saying, if I want to have this title or this kind of responsibility, this kind of impact, what do I need to do in order to get there?

0:05:28 Ramona Shaw: And, and ultimately, when we take a step back, I think the root cause of this is that we get comfortable in doing something we notice we are good at. I am good at being consistent. I dont need someone to hold me accountable to delivering on tasks. I dont need someone to tell me when projects are due or when we hit certain milestones. I don’need. Help with that. I im really good with this, but its comfortable.

0:05:55 Ramona Shaw: I dont need to stretch it comes very natural to me. Like it probably comes natural to you either this or other things in your work, you do something really well, but it’easy. It’s kind of easy for you to do. So we all have this. Now the question is, if I don’t rely purely on this thing that comes easy to me and is comfortable, how do I push myself forward into this uncomfortable zone in order to achieve the results?

0:06:21 Ramona Shaw: The end game. Not the means to the end, but the actual end of it. And I think there are a few specific patterns that we may find ourselves in when we get a bit too complacent or too comfortable. And I wrote down a few of those where I see this, either for myself or see this with my clients, where certain behaviors or habits are in demonstration of comfort when done in balance and to some degree, it’s not a problem. But when we rely on them or we do too much of this, it likely holds us back because we’re staying in that comfort zone for too long.

0:07:02 Ramona Shaw: So let’s see, I got about six of them. The first one is when we believe that doing a good enough job will get us to the next level. Good enough is simply good enough. And sometimes we really want to just do good enough. You might have something going on in your personal life, or you’re not feeling well mentally or physically or emotionally, or you just had a child. And there are things where we want to just do a good enough job.

0:07:32 Ramona Shaw: But when we’re trying to progress and improve, anchoring ourselves into doing a good enough job is definitely holding us back. So then we have to look at where am I just doing good enough job? But I haven’t really pushed the envelope. I haven’t really asked myself, how can I do this better? And even if it’s uncomfortable for me. For example, I had this conversation with a coach friend earlier today when I put something when I even this podcast, when I write a title for a podcast, I write it in a way that I think my audience will be inclined to click on it. But I don’t want it to be all catchy or I’m not focusing on it being SEO friendly.

0:08:13 Ramona Shaw: I’m literally trying to create or hone in on the essence of the episode. Now, that is how I like to listen to my podcast. But you know what? I want this podcast to grow. I want the audience to grow. And so if people search for being too comfortable, that’s probably not the title they’re going to search for. No one’s going to Google, hey, I am feeling too comfortable. So maybe I need to push the envelope here and ask myself how do I get more people to find this podcast or this podcast episode and listen to it? And it might be instead of just going with what I think is the right title, I need to think about SEO or I need to do some other analysis to look at what are topics out there?

0:08:54 Ramona Shaw: What do people like or ask themselves. So that’s one example here. I’m going to stick with the example of the podcast here since you’re listening to the podcast or watching this on YouTube. So that’s one doing good enough job and not challenging ourselves to see how can we improve. The second one is not to have a coach or a mentor. And it’s kind of easy to say, no, I’m good, I’m self reflective and, you know, I have a boss and the boss is kind of a coach and a mentor.

0:09:26 Ramona Shaw: But really that may be just a comfortable way to be being confronted by feedback or mentorship. Where were exposing ourselves and our questions? To have vulnerabilities can be very uncomfortable, but that is how we grow, how we have someone else put up a mirror, how we have someone else challenge our ways of thinking. I debrief the 360 a feedback report two days ago with a client, and this particular client was very nervous about receiving that report because of course we think, oh my gosh, so much negative stuff might come up and people are going to share anonymously what they truly think. And that is very scary for people to expose themselves to this process.

0:10:09 Ramona Shaw: But by the way, this 360 report was great. Turned out to be really, really useful, insightful and well balanced between constructive feedback and lots of recognition for my clients skillse sets and performance. But the, but the fear is real. And so if we never really expose ourselves to these types of conversations or these types of processes where we try to understand our blind spots better, try to get and solicit feedback, we’re staying in the comfort zone for too long.

0:10:42 Ramona Shaw: And the third one actually goes somewhat hand in hand with that second point, which is not to solicit feedback. And now I’m not talking about having a mentor or a coach that really puts you through the process in somewhat of an intensified or accelerated pace, but the ongoing soliciting of feedback. I once had a client who started a new job is a C suite role, and the entire leadership team would sit with the CEO every other week, I believe. And in that one on one meeting, the CEO requested that they would share one thing that they appreciate about the relationship or that’s going well in the relationship. And one thing that isn’t going well, and the CEO would provide that feedback to the employee, their direct report.

0:11:28 Ramona Shaw: And the direct report also had to give this type of feedback to the CEO. This particular CEO really exposed themselves to the uncomfortable situations or uncomfortable conversations with the director, direct reports, because on a regular basis they were soliciting this feedback. Not a lot of people do this. And whether this particular process resonates with you or you think this is feasible or useful for you, that’s not the point.

0:11:53 Ramona Shaw: The point is, are you seeking feedback from the people that you serve, from the project teams you work with, your direct reports, your managers, stakeholders, on a regular basis to better understand what’s working for them and what isn’t working for them, and engage in these conversations that may, you know, make your stomach tighten up a bit or that you’re a little anxious about. That is where we lean into this discomfort and really tap into the full potential of our growth.

0:12:25 Ramona Shaw: The fifth point is to take initiative and lean out the window a bit, is what I like to say. Taking initiative means we are experimenting with new behaviors or new routines in the way that we lead or the way that we engage with our coworkers. It may also be initiatives, as if I see a problem and I think I can solve it, and so I present a solution or I address the problem, whether or not it is my job, based on my job description.

0:12:58 Ramona Shaw: And of course, being mindful here not to step on anyone’s toes, but are you seen as someone who takes initiative, even if that means youre leaning out the window a bit, its a little uncomfortable because maybe youve never done it. Second, maybe you dont have like formal authority. And third, you dont know yet what other people will think of your initiative and whether or not it will work out. A lot of time when we talk about experimenting with new leadership behaviors, we try something based on a hypothesis. But whether or not this is going to work and whether its’going to resonate or not, we will find out through the process. But as we experiment with these things, we learn, we gather new insights, we start to see certain patterns and then can adapt or not, just as a result of that.

0:13:44 Ramona Shaw: So that is number four. Number five is not really thinking about your next career goal. What is it that you want to achieve next? And you might have multiple different options. You might say, hey, internally, if I do stake with this company, here is what my next career goal would look like. You may say, I want to stayave at this company, but I don’t want to stayave it in my department. So my next career goal would be a lateral move into a different department.

0:14:13 Ramona Shaw: That’s career goal then how are you going to achieve that? It’s the next question. If you are not sure whether you want to stay with this organization or even with this job, you might think about doing something completely different. You might have parallel tracks. You might say, I haven’t decided yet, but if I stay with the company, I’m going to go for this. And here’s what the effort I put into while in this job to achieve disc goal.

0:14:34 Ramona Shaw: But I’m also in parallel looking at what my goal may be in this other job or other gig or other company in order to push forward. Not just not necessarily single mindedly, although great if you have a single minded goal, but for some people it is exploring different options and then set goals for each option. In pursuos, what that means is younna communicate to the right audience that you’re pursuing this goal. People that could help you get to this school or would be in the room where decisions would be made about promotions. For example, they should know that you’re pursuing this goal. You then want to solicit feedback on how to get to this goal and you want to push yourself out of your comfort zone.

0:15:22 Ramona Shaw: Do more now than what is asked of you in order to demonstrate to other people that have extra capacity. You have skills and eagerness and drive to pursue this goal. As a caring and driven manager, I know you want to strengthen your leadership skills, advance your career and lead a high performing, engaged team. And in order to do that, as a leader, you need to lead with a system, not by shooting from your hips or reacting to everyone else around you.

0:15:51 Ramona Shaw: To do so, you need to first learn what should go into your leadership system and second, develop your own. But here’the good news. I created a concise, actionable, and yet comprehensive course on one component of the leadership system, and this is about how to successfully run one on one meetings with your direct reports. It includes over 67 minutes of tactical leadership training, plus a set of resources to make this as easy and immediately applicable for you as possible.

0:16:20 Ramona Shaw: You can get your hands on this course, which I want every single manager to have for a nominal $19 at ramonashaw.com one one. That’s two times the number one. You can check the show notes for the details or head on over to ramonashjah.com one one and get started right away. So that would be number five and then number six is actually not tracking progress on that goal. So for me, for example, going back to my personal situation, I do track, for example, when I lift weight, I do track my reps and my weight, but I don’really.

0:16:58 Ramona Shaw: I didn’t really set a goal. I don’t say by June of 2024, this is how much I want to be able to lift. I’ve never done that. Why not? I don’t know. Because I got so satisfied with the consistency of going to the gym and just pushing myself a little harder. But I didn’t track towards a goal. So I was putting myself on into a more comfortable position than I should have. I would have pushed myself harder. And I will. Now that you know, when we know better, we do better.

0:17:28 Ramona Shaw: Now that I have this clarity, I will set these specific goals on how much I want to push. Similarly with the podcast, yes, I do track how many people listen to it or download it, and the engagement with the episodes or the engagements on social media channels. But I didn’t really set targets of where do in to go and then from that target, look back at what is the strategy that I need to execute in order to get there.

0:17:52 Ramona Shaw: And as I’m tracking and if I’m not progressing fast enough to pivot and adjust my strategy, because clearly I’m not on track, and then when I’m not on track, I have to pivot to see what else could get me closer to that result and would be more effective. So with careers and jobs that you’re pursuing, do the same thing, like figure out what will help me in my career progression, what is something I can track towards in order to see if I’m moving in the right direction and to make sure that you’re staying motivated and engaged and you have this sense of accountability for yourself to see if you’re pushing yourself hard enough for if you’re gravitating towards the comfort zone. And I get that weightlifting is easy to track and in particular ch jobs.

0:18:42 Ramona Shaw: It’s hard to measure against something a KPI that you could look at. But try to be creative, try to figure something out. Maybe it is number of conversations that you have with stakeholders, number of interviews that you have with companies, number of courses you attend and then the applications, number of new projects that you propose internally, number of ideas that you present to stakeholders and so forth.

0:19:09 Ramona Shaw: So get creative with this. These are the six particular areas where I find discomfort. Sot of sneaking in. Most often I’m going to quickly recap them. One was doing a good enough job, but being satisfied with that. Two is not to hire a coach or to seek out a mentor to holds up that mirror and might enlist you in some uncomfortable conversations. Three, not soliciting feedback internally on a regular basis.

0:19:35 Ramona Shaw: Four was not to take initiatives. Five was not preparing a career goal or pursuing clear career goals. And then the last one was to not track your growth. So I hope these different patterns that I presented here help you be self reflective and build some greater awareness of where you might be holding yourself back in that comfortable zone. And it may even be something that you don’t recognize for yourself, but something that you recognize for someone on your team or multiple people on your team.

0:20:07 Ramona Shaw: Those that you’re supposed to support in their career goals as their manager. There is huge power in you as a manager to provide stretch assignments and to push your direct reports into the next levels in terms of their progression and instill a sense of confidence in them to tell them like, I see your potential, I believe in you, I got your back and so forth. So in addition to hopefully this being insightful for you personally, I hope this may also help you think about your different team members and how you might be able to help them to continuously grow.

0:20:43 Ramona Shaw: I have a few reflective questions here before we wrap up. One is what is it that you’re focused on in achieving? What is your answer to this? And when I say reflective questions, you know, pause the podcast or the YouTube video here, write this down for yourself. We’re also going to put this in the show notes. By the way, if you want to go grab the questions. Number two, what do you need to learn in order to reach your goal?

0:21:06 Ramona Shaw: What strength could you possibly be overdoing that are holding you back? What I mean by this is we all have strength, but when we overdo them like a thermostatatic all of a sudden gets too hot, they start to become ineffective. So earlier I was saying how Im’pretty accountable to and reliable on terms of my deliverables. That is a strength of mine. But when I overdo it, I miss out on ambition or on competitiveness to challenge myself.

0:21:36 Ramona Shaw: Next, who knows about your goal or goals and how can they support you? Have you asked them for help? This goes back to coaching or mentoring or even just soliciting or even just getting buy in and support from the people around you. And then lastly, how do you plan to achieve your goal and what steps you need to to get you there? So I asked earlier the question what do you need to learn? But that is only one part. Learning in itself doesn’t knock at you any results.

0:22:04 Ramona Shaw: So what is it that you need to learn, and then what is your current hypothesis of how to reach that goal? What’s your plan and what steps do you need to take? These are some questions that I invite you to think about if you currently feel a little bit complacent or uninspired with what that next career step might be, or you simply haven’t thought about it enough, or you recognize from listening to this episode that, yeah, maybe you’ve just like me, been a little comfortable in how things are going versus truly stretching yourself.

0:22:33 Ramona Shaw: Sometimes I present content or insights in this podcast that I pick up from other clients, or some of the things are from my past mistakes and lessons learned. And then sometimes it’s things that I really need to hear for myself. And I create an episode because I acknowledge this is where I fall short and I want to dig deeper into this. And then I create the episode for myself. And I think that hopefully someone else listening needed to hear this as well, who is on this journey with me and can identify with the comfort and how we might have this false sense of accomplishment that really is just a means to the end but not the end itself. And in order to reach that end game, we might need to let go of some of our consistency and try new things and different things that feel a bit more uncomfortable.

0:23:25 Ramona Shaw: With that said, if you have people on your team or coworkers or friends that would benefit from hearing this, as well as with every episode, please share the along spread the word about The Manager Track podcast if this has been helping you and your job in your career, with your work and your leadership, we greatly appreciated. Thanks so much and I’ll be back next week. Ciao ciao.0:23:48 Ramona Shaw: If you enjoyed this episode, then check out two other awesome resources to help you become a leader people love to work with. This includes my best selling book, the Confident, incomp competent new manager, which you can find on Amazon or ramonashaw.com book, and a free training on how to successfully lead as a new manager, check it out@ramonashaw.com masterclass these resources in a couple more youll find in the show notes down below.